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How I Reduced My Anxieties

Experience submitted by Michael

I had a lot of anxieties as a child, which included the common instinctive fears of spiders, snakes, wild animals, injury, darkness and ghosts.

Alongside these, I had other anxieties that were socially-related, such as feeling self-conscious when talking to others, fearing conflict, or concern about fitting in with my peers and being accepted. Although I managed to reduce some childhood fears by adulthood, many other aspects of anxiety persisted and sometimes had the effect of reducing my opportunities, as I would avoid anxiety-provoking situations.

I tried various psychological approaches, which included de-sensitization, hypnotherapy and NLP, but wasn’t satisfied with the results of these techniques in reducing my overall anxiety.

Finding a More Powerful Technique

Later on, I discovered Belsebuub’s work, which included a technique to reduce not only anxieties, but also many other negative or unwanted thoughts, feelings and emotions in a profound way.

I thought the technique was a little too simple when I first heard about it, as it contrasted with the psychological techniques I had learnt, in that it called upon forces outside of my own mind, specifically the personal inner Divine Mother. Although I’d had an interest in spirituality for some years, I also had a natural skepticism about certain approaches and theories, which I felt were too dependent on belief, rather than objective personal experience.

However, I remained open to this more esoteric approach and decided to explore the technique directly.  The process of change took a while, but I found that by persistently applying the technique, I was able to reduce many unwanted inner states, including various anxieties, feeling freer and happier as a result.

It was interesting to see the change occurring in the ordinary events of my life, as well as encouraging and motivating. I could see that by consistently practicing the technique, I gained a greater level of freedom and was able to open up new opportunities.

Reducing My Fear of the Dark

I noticed some early examples of reduced anxiety in simple areas of my life during the time I started practicing the technique to remove unwanted inner states. I lived alone in a one-bedroom apartment, which had a small garden area at the back, and when I came home in the evening, I used to always check that there was no-one hiding there in the dark.

I knew theoretically that since I lived in a safe area it was unlikely that an assailant would be hiding in the garden waiting for me, but before I found the technique to reduce unwanted inner states, this logical information wasn’t enough to stop the anxiety from persisting. However, by applying the technique, I was able to reduce this small anxiety and gain a more objective view as well as feel calmer upon returning home.

A similar illogical anxiety had persisted from childhood, in which I sometimes felt anxious when alone at night, despite being in a locked apartment in a safe location. But as with the above scenario, the anxiety still persisted beneath my logical reasoning and I would often leave a light on, so that it was visible from the bedroom.

Photo by Lalesh Aldarwish on Pexels

Again, by persisting with the technique to remove anxiety whenever I saw it, the childhood fear of the dark began to diminish and I felt more comfortable to sleep in a darkened room again, which also allowed for a better night’s sleep.

Reducing Social Anxieties

I also found the technique to remove lower emotions to be effective in reducing more social-based anxieties, many of which had persisted from childhood, despite morphing in various ways. For example, when in an unfamiliar area, I sometimes wandered around lost, rather than approaching strangers to ask for directions. This particular anxiety probably had different factors to it, such as not wanting to look silly or draw attention to myself, as well as wanting to fit in as a “local.”

However, by using the technique to remove lower emotions, this was a relatively easy aspect of anxiety to reduce. It was also much more beneficial to be without this anxiety, as it was obviously a lot more practical to ask for help to orientate myself in an unfamiliar area!

A similar social anxiety used to emerge when talking to people I was unfamiliar with, where I would babble to cover up my nervousness. Again, by reducing this anxiety, I was able to find a way to interact in a better way with people, which was not only more comfortable for me, but may have also had the effect of putting others more at ease, as the interaction became more natural.

On another occasion, I went to an open mic evening after work, as part of a fundraising event. I enjoyed singing and thought it would be nice to join in with the event. However, although I had taken part in group performances before and felt comfortable among my work colleagues, somehow a feeling of anxiety crept in prior to my turn, which I could feel building up in the area of my stomach.

I had noticed this feeling sometimes before, for example, when anticipating giving a presentation in front of a group at work. For some reason, it seemed stronger on this occasion though, so I worked on applying the technique to remove these unwanted feelings, which persisted for some time. Rather than giving into the anxieties, I did my best to clear my inner state, and gain a greater sense of inner calm, as opposed to a perpetual unease, before going ahead with the performance, which received some positive feedback afterwards.

Dealing with Conflict

Another music-related event also stirred up strong feelings of anxiety within me, although the context was very different.

At the time, I was very unwell and had been lying in bed for some days, curled up in pain, which became worse whenever I moved. Unfortunately, the tenant in the apartment below had some friends staying, all of whom enjoyed clubbing. For a few nights, they kept me awake with loud techno music in the early hours of the morning, on their return from the night club.

I hadn’t interacted with the tenant before and wasn’t sure how he would react to me asking to turn the music down. But at the same time, it was imperative that I rested. I had some apprehension about provoking a conflict, particularly as I thought it was likely that the group would have also had quite a few drinks during the evening. However, I worked on applying the technique to remove lower inner states and after gaining a more conscious state of being, continued to observe within and apply the technique as I went downstairs to express my point.

The tenant was reasonably accommodating on that occasion, although similar incidents persisted in the months that followed.  I chatted with the tenant in the meantime, so felt a bit more comfortable about knocking to ask for the volume to be turned down. But I still wanted to work on reducing the anxiety that was coming up in anticipation of a potential conflict, as well as understanding the processes of that particular inner state in my life.

I wondered if I hadn’t been firm enough on the first occasion, or if I should have considered other options to handle the situation. However, it seemed that the situation could easily be inflamed if I acted without the correct judgement. So I used the technique of observing my own negative internal reactions and praying for their removal, in order to try and stay peaceful inside and state my case without provoking a conflict.

I felt that doing what I could to maintain my inner clarity and calmness was essential in the situation, and although it was challenging, it eventually subsided after some time, when the circumstances of the other tenants changed and they stopped their clubbing activities. However, what I was left with was some valuable learning and insight into how that particular aspect of anxiety functioned in my life, as well as how much freer and happier I became without it.

Coping with Long-Term Illness

The illness I mentioned became a long-term issue and I had some concerns when I first received a diagnosis, as I knew the prognosis could be quite poor and have a significant impact upon my quality of life.

The illness did indeed affect my life in a profound way. However, due to my experiences in seeing the benefits of prayer in other areas of my life, I asked for guidance to find a way to recover and maintained a faith that the illness could be overcome, which reduced my fears about the future.

A challenging aspect of the illness was that many of its symptoms were unseen to others, which gave the impression that I was relatively fit and healthy.  Sometimes this led to stressful situations, such as being persuaded to take on extra shifts at work, but finding myself pushed for time, or experiencing an increase in symptoms.

I continued to apply the technique to reduce anxiety when in stressful situations, such as when I was rushing for the bus. However, I realized that although the technique was beneficial, it was not a “cure all” to patch up wrong decisions and in the case with work, it was foolish to get into situations that I knew would put me under unnecessary pressure. I realized that the situation was not sustainable, as I had a responsibility not only to be well enough to do my job properly, but also to maintain my own health.

I initially found it difficult to set firm boundaries regarding what I could and couldn’t do, but felt that I needed to be firmer in not going over my limits and prayed for guidance to find the best way of dealing with the situation.

It was challenging, but by persisting in observing my own reactions, whilst praying for removal of negative inner states and guidance to act correctly, the situation eventually changed and allowed new circumstances to take place.

Conclusion

Although some situations have taken a longer time to understand and overcome, the learning I have eventually gained from them has been invaluable.

I can definitely say that the techniques I learned from Belsebuub’s work have benefited me in reducing persistent anxieties, as well as other ongoing inner states, bringing as a result more freedom and peace in my life.

12 comments
  • Thanks Michael for reminding about the power of prayer to the Divine Mother. I am trying to develop the connection to the Divine Mother as a destroyer too. Different cultures speak of this power that she has within their sacred song, dance and writings (eg. the Durga Chalisa https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9dsCXn2a3A). On a personal level I also find it helpful to pray to her because it somehow makes the emotions of the moment less encompassing.

    • Yes, I agree Alex. I’ve also found that praying to my divine mother can have a very powerful effect upon reducing the intensity of various emotions and helping me to feel clearer.

  • Thank you very much for sharing your experiences Michael. I was also really surprised by the simplicity of the technique with the Divine Mother, so much so I remember asking myself how I never thought of doing it before on my own 🙂

    I was touched by what you wrote about having faith in overcoming your illness and difficulties. I think your story about sticking to working with the Divine Mother and seeing difference arise out of it is something that stands for us all.

    Thanks again for sharing!

  • Michael thanks for putting all those experiences and insights together, I found it really helpful and I’m sure anyone who experiences anxiety and fear will relate to it as I did.

    I share many of your experiences of how anxiety and fear can be so crippling in taking action in life and how it impacts on the way I live my life, communicate with others and also how it affects my heart felt wishes to grow spiritually.

    I’ve been trying to focus on that inner stillness, that place in the centre within, that Maia shares in her comment below and it has helped me to see and feel how these inner states of fear and anxiety pull and push me. And it has helped me to not go along with them and know that they are not me but they are like momentary ‘winds’ that come and will go, as strong as they may seem. And now I can see that though they are temporary in nature, when I have succumbed to them, their repercussions and the consequences they bring has been long lived. So I’m learning a bit more, bit by bit, with a lot of asking for divine help and actually putting in the effort to not go along with these fears and anxieties, and instead trying to be with that inner peace and fighting for it as that is what is the eternal ever-living part and it brings more of itself to me. I am so grateful to Belsebuub for all his love and kindness in explaining with such clarity how to be free of these and so many other low states.

    Thanks again Michael and I truly hope your experience sheds a lot of light for people who are seeking a way to understand and overcome these things in themselves, and to see their own and very real potential for inner peace and clarity.

  • Thank you, Michael, for tracing with such a meticulous way inner states related to anxiety, fear, and how you have been really helped by applying the teachings and the effective technique of elimination.

    Your understanding of each state can be very helpful for people who are facing the same problems and have to overcome their skepticism as well. Because I feel that one of our bigger problems in order to find a solution or carry on trying something different or new, and with all raised obstacles, is to ”break” what we think about it. We think that something is impossible, for example, or not there for us, and here we are back again facing fear and pride as you said, having their own share in this struggle of clearness. But as I read somewhere, there is another way to live, not in the ”foam” of our days but in the depth of our being, where the water is always calm…
    Wishing you all much strength to reach these waters and find this peace within.

  • Thanks Michael its amazing how we go through our lives it seems in constant fear and anxieties pulled in one direction to other, however by logically looking at our fears the situations are usually a lot less stressful than our egos likes us to think, I have also seen these sensations you mention thanks for highlighting it

  • It was nice to read over your experiences, Michael, and see what you have achieved using Belsebuub’s technique. I can relate to many of the examples you mentioned and can also attest to the effectiveness of the technique. So simple yet so powerful. .

  • Hi Michael,

    Thanks for sharing about your successes in reducing anxiety. As you said, so many of them can be illogical when you think about it, and you may know it doesn’t make sense, but when the circumstance occurs that brings it up you can’t seem to help it.

    Mark writes in the new edition of the Searching Within book, paraphrased, that an anxious person could have an underlying feeling of anxiety or fear that starts as soon as they wake up and lasts the whole day. I think I’m like that! And yet on most days there is actually nothing external to cause that reaction of anxiety to arise within, but it just keeps going out of habit and its own momentum, like he describes. There can even be a feeling that something is wrong unless I’m feeling that familiar anxiety. And then because there is this constant slight anxiety and tension going on underneath, when situations occur such as what you have described, like meeting other people, the anxiety can feel exaggerated and really out of proportion with the situation, because it has been gaining strength through that constant presence within.

    This type of social anxiety tends to make you over analyze and overreact to other people’s gestures, words, tone of voice etc. and interpret it according to its own distorted viewpoint – that it all relates to you. I noticed that if I’m in that state then a huge fear is for the other person to notice your anxiety and think less of you for it – because the anxiety wants the outside world to view you positively, yet you fear they will ‘discover’ what you really are (fearful and uncertain). And on the opposite side is the high you get when others praise you and think well of you. It’s so much about what (you imagine) others think of you and takes up huge amounts of your energy.

    It has been interesting to notice with self-observation and analysis that this anxiety strongly draws your attention to yourself and makes you imagine that others are paying you that intense attention too, like you are the centre of the world, as Mark says. It has been helpful to realise this is not the case – other people feel they are the centre of their world too. This has helped me to feel more free and relaxed with others and have more love for them, because it isn’t about me at all, and like you said, it helps them feel more relaxed and natural as a result too. This is a great related talk: https://soundcloud.com/belsebuub/pride

    Wishing you continued success and much strength in the work of getting free from these negative states.

    • Hi Laura, thanks very much for your perspective on these different types of anxiety. I can relate to having an underlying sense of agitation, which is gradually gathering momentum. The example that comes to mind is a little different, in that it’s perhaps more related to impatience, but I used to often hate travelling to work or on long journeys and would have this agitation bubbling until I reached my stop. Perhaps there were also aspects related to anxiety, such as feeling I couldn’t move freely in a crowded vehicle. Thankfully, these feelings have gradually reduced over the years, since finding out about Belsebuub’s work, and it’s a much nicer way to live.

      The talk on pride is a very good one, which makes some good points about how the egos can work in co-operation with each other, such as with the opposite states of pride and anxiety. Social anxiety can have such a big impact upon us, yet it’s often completely illogical, as most other people are also concerned about how they appear to others. I agree that it helps a lot in building more genuine social interactions with others when we can reduce these anxieties.

      I also wish you a lot of success in getting free of these negative states and finding a greater sense of peace within.

  • Thank you for sharing those experiences, Michael! You gave so many examples there for how anxiety can affect all of our lives, and an illustration of how to face anxiety-provoking situations with wisdom and intelligence. Your facing health problems really stood out as that requires a lot of bravery and understanding, which you clearly had to fight for.

    I can relate to pretty much everything you described to some degree and it made me reflect on some of the silly behaviours I have adopted as a result of letting anxiety and related states take control. Describing your reluctance to ask for directions is all too familiar for me! But alas, there is pride, and a self-image to protect (not really true but how the mind works), making asking for directions and seeming out of place seem unthinkable.

    I find that some types of fears are more linked with my overall internal “level” at the time. After a day where I’ve been angry or stressed, I am more susceptible to worries about my career/health, reacting with fright to sudden movements in the corner of my eye, and even just raw fear of the darkness (especially if I have an out of body experience in such an evening).

    I’m really glad you persisted and used the technique to reduce negative inner states, despite your original reluctance and/or skepticism. It seems that the simplest things can also be the most effective and life-changing. The power of the Divine Mother is truly awesome and given all the darkness we are up against, I cannot imagine any other way to truly overcome it.

    It was a lovely read. Wishing you lots of guidance and health!

    • Thanks for your comments Mike. Having tried many other techniques to reduce anxiety, I definitely agree that the power of the Divine Mother has been the most effective and life-changing so far, even though the technique may seem so simple.

      I also wish you a lot of guidance and strength in moving forwards.

About Belsebuub

Prior to withdrawing from public life in 2010, author Belsebuub had written several books and many articles on the topic of self-discovery. Read more

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