I’ve found the technique of eliminating the egos that I learned from Belsebuub’s work to be profound, and through it I have been able to bring about gradual changes within, overcoming different emotional states and reactions that, before learning of this process, I believed were a permanent part of myself.
It is a very gradual process, however, and sometimes the progress can seem very slow or almost nonexistent. I had one particularly strong experience that showed me just how fast acting and powerful this practice can be.
I’d had a particularly stressful day at university, the weather was rainy and miserable, and through my frenzied states and the places I’d been, I had a song stuck in my head. I would try to be aware and observe myself and invariably notice the song.
I would pray to my Divine Mother for help, and the song would dissipate slightly, but it was always there the next time I looked within. I tried hard to persist with awareness and focus intently upon overcoming that state as I prepared dinner, ate, cleaned up, and finished my work for the night. But the song was still there.
As I went to bed, I did an astral projection practice. I think I was actually getting into it quite well, but that song began playing in my head. So I began to focus my attention and prayers towards the song and the elimination of the inner state causing it.
As I prayed, the song got a little quieter. Then it would come back. I would pray harder. Then it would come back. As this process was going on, I was falling asleep. It was near the verge of sleep that things got very interesting…
The song suddenly became more than just a “tune in my head”: I could actually hear it. As though there were speakers right next to my ears.
I prayed more for divine assistance. The sound seemed to go down. Then it came back with a vengeance – like I was at a heavy metal concert.
The state producing the tune in my head clearly did *not* want to go. I intensified my prayers and kept solely focused upon them. The music got quieter. And quieter. And quieter.
Eventually it faded out altogether. At this point, the only way I could hear the song was by intentionally thinking about recreating its sound (which I knew wasn’t a good thing to do).
By being persistent and through the mystical perceptions brought about in those moments of weaving in and out of sleep due to drowsiness, I was able to gain a whole new perspective on the elimination of the egos, and I’ve gained faith that the practice does bring about immediate effects, even if I can’t always perceive the immediate effects as clearly as in this experience.